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The Importance of New Friendships

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The Importance of New Friendships

A photo of my friends  Franzi  and  Martine

A photo of my friends Franzi and Martine

Making new friends gets harder and harder as we grow up. Being out of school and in an everyday routine means we often just see the same people over and over. For a while I also had a tendency to think people were already settled with their group of friends and not looking to form any new friendships, but I was wrong. Making new friends is such a good feeling; it’s inspiring and motivating, it can also completely change your daily life.

In the past year, I have formed a couple of new friendships that were definitely unexpected. Two of them were through work and it confirmed to me that it is still possible to build new connections in your twenties (also in an environment that can be competitive at times). I think work friends are the best because they make you want to get up and go to work, they uplift you, and you get to see them all the time. Even now, having left my job a month ago, I still talk almost daily with three of my ex-colleagues-now-pals there.

And since being in London, I have made new friends, but I have also cultivated a friendship that existed mostly online through Instagram DMs and blog comments. The people I’ve met in London are in the same boat as me; having left their home country to pursue their dreams in The Big Smoke. We are united by this common situation and now we get to exchange about it and live all of it together (almost like a family).

So that’s all from me today. I feel like I’m just so happy about these new friendships and I hope I get to experience that feeling many times again as I get older. The great thing about making new friends as adults is that it’s an active choice, it is not just because you are in the same class at school and befriend the first kid that wants to play with you. Let me know in the comments if you have experiences of making friends in your twenties!


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How To Feel Less Lonely In A New City

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How To Feel Less Lonely In A New City

Image by Daphne David. Wearing clothes from Own The Couture & Love that Bag

Image by Daphne David. Wearing clothes from Own The Couture & Love that Bag

Moving country on your own can have its ups and downs. In my first week here, I felt both extremely excited and a bit lonely at times. Thankfully, there are ways to combat the loneliness until I settle completely, I just have to be open to the new possibilities! And today I’m sharing these ideas with you…

Meet people online

Instagram is probably the best app ever created because it allows you to meet people that share common interests (I guess Twitter is a bit the same). Through Instagram, I’ve met people my age with blogs (or not) that live in different cities across the world. It’s even better if they live in your new city. I’m meeting two of them in the coming week and I’m really looking forward to it. The easiest way is start a conversation with them about things you have in common or to reply to one of their posts and then who knows, maybe you will meet IRL and it will feel like you’ve been friends forever!

I’ve also heard of Bumble Bff, which is basically an app to meet friends, and I’m definitely planning on trying it!

Attend Events

While making friends is hard, you can always attend events. I’m talking events about something you love; a book Q&As with an author you like, a live podcast recordings, music shows, etc. Just the feeling of being surrounded with people that are there for the same reason you are can have a big impact on how you’re feeling. And although it can be harder to strike up a conversation with the people there because you feel vulnerable, these people are there for the same reason you are.

Events are easy to find on social media, but also on places like Eventbrite. If you’re into books like me, it’s worth checking bookstores and following your favourite authors.

Create background noise

This advice is for people who live on their own and have a lot of solitary time. Creating background noise, either by listening to a podcast, watching a YouTube video or putting on a movie, can make all the difference. Listen to these things while you walk on your own, while you cook or eat or while you’re cleaning up. What I like about podcasts is that they feel very intimate and often you’ll feel like you’re part of a conversation with friends. For podcast recommendations, see here, but at the moment I’ve really been loving ‘Things You Can’t Ask Yer Mum’ by Lindsey Holland and Lizzy Hadfield.

What are your tips for feeling less lonely in a new city?


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Setting Intentions

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Setting Intentions

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Setting intentions is not just reserved for the new year. To me, goals are meant to be revisited every couple of months so they become more suited to my desires. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about ways to reach my objectives in the short term. Spirituality is sometimes associated with techniques of intention/manifestation, but to be honest, is not really for me. I do still think there can be some truth to it, at least when it comes to structure. So here is what I’m currently using to set my intentions in order to be productive, optimistic and effective.

Create a vision board

The idea of making a vision was suggested to me by my new colleague Joelle. She’s been using this technique for years and really noticed a difference in her life. A vision board consists of a collage with images that inspire you, that represent something you want to accomplish, or something you’re hoping for. I’ve made mine last night and already felt so inspired. The photographs and quotes you choose don’t have to be specific. They can be obvious to you at first glance, but don’t have to be for everyone. Joelle also made sure to tell me that once your vision board is done, you have to place it somewhere where you’ll see it often. This is very important! Looking at it repeatedly will ultimately bring you closer to your goals.

The year list

Every year, I create a new note on my phone with the year (e.g. ‘2019’) as the title. This list is divided into two ways. Firstly, I have a list of goals for the year. Mine last year included visiting to Oslo, walking 10K steps every day for a month, reading at least 52 books and saving X amount of money. In the second part, I write all the cool things that have happened under each month. This can be anything from having brunch with a friend to obtaining a good grade or getting an interview for your dream job. Typically there are around 10-15 cool things every month. At the end of the year, I reflect on my goals, but also on each month that has passed, and I usually put a star on the ‘things’ I’m the happiest with. I have been doing this since 2013 and it’s such a good daily reminder of what’s good in my life and where' I’m heading.

How do you set intentions?

T-shirt: Filippa K / Skirt: Ganni / Shoes: Céline / Necklace: Missoma x Lucy Williams


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